It's clear that pregnant women experience a variety of changes during pregnancy (emotions, physical, mental fatigue, etc.). And I firmly believe that it is important for the man to be available for the woman in each of the previously described facets of change. For example, if Girl is riding an emotional roller coaster b/c of surging hormones, Boy needs to be understanding and patient and willing to be emotionally available for what girl may need...I think.
My two books - The Expectant Father and Dude, You're Gonna Be A Dad! - have done a swell job at prepping me for these changing times. I'm comfortable knowing how to respond to any pregnancy situation that may arise with Wife.
But what about a pregnancy situation that arrives with me?
Let's get back to ol' Metal-head from before. I think I'm typically a mild-mannered guy. I take a very laid-back but confident approach to life, and will only turn aggressive if threatened or if Wife is disrespected. But what's been happening the past two months is unreal.
The symptoms of rage-man began in June - about two months after we found out about the pregnancy - when I decided to trade in my running workouts for weights. Summer is usually when I get back into running. Weather is great, trails are ready, and the playlists are set. But rage-man decided that this will be a summer to strength gain, and try new sandbag workouts. And so it began. Rage-man took off in a different direction than old-me would have.
Not long after the strength training took off, rage-man decided to increase his capacity for craziness. Old-me would typically go for some good country or old-school Hip-Hop to set the tone for summer. Rage-man had different plans. The pace setting strums of Country were quickly replaced by the fast and furious storm of Metallica. I immediately put four Metallica albums on my iTunes with more on the way. The CD player in my car plays only Metallica. And rage-me enjoys every second of it. Heavy workouts, constant Metallica...maybe this will fade.
With big workouts 5 days a week and Metallica on shuffle, rage-me decided to add one more piece to the puzzle of horror: fighting. I got into a fight in 5th grade once. A dude was taunting me during recess basketball. After I got my shot blocked, I walked over to him and proceeded to throw a fury of punches at him. The noon aide broke it up and sent me to the office. That was the only fight I ever started. Thankfully rage-me hasn't gotten in any fights recently. But he's sure been looking. While me and my wife were in Seaside Heights, NJ for a family vacation, I knew something was wrong. Rage-me wanted to fight every guy we walked past. At one point, I was attempting to get my wife's younger brothers (not 21) into a restaurant. We were told by the hostess that they were not permitted. I politely asked for her to get the manager. She proceeded to return with a 6'4'' bald guy with a Fu Manchu and tats all up his arms. Good job bringing over the "manager." No matter, rage-me thought he could take the tatted "manager" no problem. Thankfully, old-me intervened and we left.
This is how life has been for the past two months. Continuous cycles of big workouts, hard metal, and wanting to fight anything with a pulse. This deemed research.
Google - "guy testosterone levels during pregnancy" - USA Today article. Here's what we find.
A direct line, "level's of the stress hormone called "cortisol" - the same ancient chemical that instructs men to fight or take flight - tend to spike about four to six weeks after men learn they're going to be fathers..."
That explains quite a bit. And I thought someone was giving me testosterone shots in my sleep. The article suggests to learn more about raising a child, and find out how to handle delivery day. Doing so should help soon-to-be fathers cope with this hormonal change.
That's the stupidest advice I've ever heard. Somebody should knock his lights out.
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